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Roaring from the Lion
 
This is a blog of my thoughts on sex, sexual encounters, relationships, women, men, and anything else remotely interesting. Read at your own interest level.
Keywords | Title View | Refer to a Friend |
From the Mouth of the Lion
Posted:Jul 3, 2012 4:20 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 9:42 pm
108476 Views
My nickname is Lion. I've always gone by that nickname online, mostly because I have an affinity for lions, and most of my online aliases tend to revolve around lions. There's something about lions that I relate to... strength, agility, grace, nobility, family values, courage. I guess there are worse animals a guy can identify with. I once knew a guy who really liked slugs, so hey...

If you'd like to post a private comment or message to me that you don't want anyone else to see, you can do so right here on this post. No one will ever see it but me. My door is open, feel free to drop in and rip your clothes off.

And you have my permission to quote any post of mine anywhere you like, and link my blog to any other blog or forum post on NoStrings.

Index - Just the highlights, not all inclusive.


Just So You Know

Your Privacy Is Protected Here*** The Generic Email That Isn't So Generic*** How To Seduce THIS Particular Woman*** Why the Lion

The Female Body Series

The Female Body A Woman's Hair*** The Female Body Sexy Hair, Part II*** The Female Body Different Flavors of Ice Cream*** The Female Body Windows to her soul*** The Female Body Scent of a Woman

The Kissing Series

Kissing Part I*** Kissing Part II The Wrath of Lion*** Kissing Part III Attack of the Boners*** Kissing Part IV The Gobbler of Fire

The Lion Growls...

Facing Reality Sucks Part I*** Facing Reality Sucks Part II*** Unknown*** Unknown*** Marshmellow Lilypad Lion*** Flirting From A Thousand Miles Away*** Spitting During Sex Really*** Is Your Man Fill in the blank seriously*** Testimonials Without Having Actually Hooked Up*** The Tease Works for Bar Scenes, Sucks on the Internet*** Prefer Not To Say

Insights From The King of the Jungle

Sex and the Older Woman a Lion39s Thoughts on the Matter*** Have you ever had a WOW moment*** The Party That Rocks The Body*** What39s Love got to do with it*** Friends with Benefits, or Fuck Buddies*** Sweet Nothings In My Ear*** Music Doth Soothe The Savage Boobs errr Breast*** Sex And The Weather The Heat Isn't Hot*** Serial Dater or Player I Don't Get It*** Socially Acceptable Nympho*** Sitting in a Coffee House, Admiring the View*** You39ve Heard of Plato Aristotle Socrates Morons*** I Would Do Anything For Love But I Won39t Do That

"Lion... Tell Me A Story..."

I Get Lucky In The Oddest Ways*** Twitterpated*** Life, it seems, is not without a sense of humor*** Lion Gets Nekkid*** Getting Sleek And Sexy 25 LBS To The Goal*** ARRRRRMY TRAINING, SAIR*** Three in One Day Lion Vs a Pride of Lionesses*** A Touch Is Worth A Thousand Words*** The One That Got Away The Story of Jenny

The Questions About Men Series
Why Are Men LIKE That Part I The Sex Drive*** Why Are Men LIKE That Part II The Penis*** So What Do You Consider Big, Anyway

Metaphors of a Second-Hand Lion Series

Metaphors of a SecondHand Lion A New Series*** Metaphors of a SecondHand Lion On Writing*** Metaphors of a SecondHand Lion The Legend of Michael Jackson*** Metaphors of a SecondHand Lion The Nature of Logic and Perception

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0 Comments , 2 Pending
Profile Information
Posted:Aug 7, 2012 8:20 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 9:41 pm
106583 Views

I didn't realize that Standard Members can't read my profile. Well, hell... I put a lot of work into that profile, and it seems the majority of women on here are Standard Members. So, what the heck? I have a blog that anyone can see if they want. Here's my profile. Feel free to contact me right here if you like.

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I'm writing a blog here, feel free to read it. lionthatroared I am able to host, if that's your preference, no problems there.

I've come to realize that, while I may have a high sex drive, I'm a romantic at heart. That's why I've decided to stop looking for NSA sex and start looking for FWB's. If we get along well and we're good friends and having amazing sex, we might start talking actual relationship status. The question is... are you woman enough to handle that?

So if you're tired of looking for just sex with anyone, and you're interested in sex with one special guy that could lead to a genuinely meaningful relationship, I'd like to take you for a cup of coffee, chat for awhile, and eventually discover all the interesting and exciting landscapes of your body.

I'm both simple and adventurous. I like quiet nights at home and fun times out and about. I like watching movies, reading, playing a board or card game, fiddling on the computer, chatting with friends. I also like going out to karaoke, hiking, swimming for exercise and water activities in general, exploring new places and trying new things, going to museums, art galleries, and live theater, and pretty much open to most anything interesting.

I'm starting a YouTube channel as I mentioned above, which I will not advertise here, but if you're interested, I'd be happy to share the link in a PM, once it's up and running (it's still being built).

And since it's pretty much a given to talk sex here... yes, I love sex. I have a very high sex drive, and I'm both giving and receiving in the bedroom. I find that if you give a lot, you get a lot, and I follow that mantra. But it's not just about sex... foreplay, cuddling, and public displays of affection are a big deal with me. I love to give it, and I especially love to receive it.

So... feel free to message me, I will respond to all messages. Thank you for reading my profile, and I hope you have a nice day.

Lion


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3 Comments
The Lion Purrs... Love Biting
Posted:Sep 7, 2016 2:14 pm
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2024 12:19 pm
62891 Views


Have you even bitten someone while you're engaged in foreplay or lovemaking?

I have, and I have to say... it appeals to me. Not that I'm taking a chunk of flesh out of the woman I'm with, but I'm using teeth and there's some pressure involved! Nibbling is amazing, and certainly adds to the pleasure of whatever sexual activity you're enjoying, But actual biting? Oh my... I have to say, I kind of like being bitten! And I've discovered that I kind of like biting my lady, too.

Naturally, it needs to be in the right context, and you need to add a certain level of romance to this. Otherwise, you're just biting someone, and that hurts with none of the stimulation involved. But when you're getting hot and heavy, and your lady is stroking your cock with one hand and has the other around your neck, that sudden and unexpected bite on the shoulder or neck drives me up a wall.I like to nibble on her neck with kisses while I press my body against her, preferably while my cock is deep inside, and when she's hot and eager.... bite her neck. Oh, does it make a woman gasp and moan!

Maybe it's the lion in me, but I also like to growl or snarl when I do it. Adds a bit of fear element to her experience, and I've actually made women orgasm doing that.

And quite a large number of women love their nipples bitten! Not just sucked or nibbled, actually bitten and pulled hard. Now, I'm a serious breast man, so I'm usually one to treat great breasts with something akin to worship... what can I say, I love 'em. Especially when her hair is draped across them.... mmmmm..... and if she has large nipples to suck on.... oh my..... burying my face between those gorgeous globes of soft skin.....

Where was I? Oh right, biting.

So when I'm begged by my partner to bite her nipples or her breasts, I won't lie... my first thought is "Okay, Lion... take it easy. Pain can be a bad thing." But the women who are begging for me to bite their nipples want me to bite with a medium to hard pressure that, frankly, kind of surprises me. I don't judge, but man... I'm not sure I'd want something so sensitive bitten that hard. Biting my nipples can be fun, but you do it too hard, and Lion's manhood will encounter sudden regression into boyhood again. Not an optimal result.

Gotta admit, though... biting a woman's ass is super-fun. Spanking it is more fun, but taking a bite into it.... it's quite satisfying, and I LOVE her reaction! Let's face it, ladies... your ass is built to be bitten, and we men just can't help ourselves when presented with such a tempting target.

So my question to you today is... do you like to bite? Do you like to be bitten? Do you have a great story to pass on that involves biting? How do you like being bitten, and where? Leave a comment below and share!

Kinda gives a whole new meaning when a woman says "Bite me!" now....

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0 Comments
SEPTEMBER DATE CHALLENGE!!!
Posted:Sep 1, 2016 5:16 am
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 9:45 pm
62802 Views


Yes, you read that right! September is the month when the ladies have to stop being passive wallflowers and step up to the plate. September is Take A Man On A Date month. I am officially throwing down the gauntlet!

I am hereby challenging every woman on this website to pick a gentleman here that you think is a decent guy, and ask him out on a date, and to KEEP asking guys out until one of them accepts!! Sounds easy, right? It probably is.... however...

RULES! Every challenge has rules, and these are mine. Think you can handle it?

Rule #1: It has to be a real date! I'm talking flowers or something to impress him, picking him up and taking him to dinner or a movie or a ballgame or someplace fun that HE wants to go to, picking up the tab and insisting that you pay, giving him a kiss goodnight, and if you liked the date, asking HIM for a second date!

Rule #2: No NSA or other hook-ups. Part of the challenge is to create a romantic date for a man, and while it's true that we guys do love sex... hook-ups are not a date! If AFTER a proper date the two of you choose to engage in various carnal pleasures, well... that sounds like a proper ending to a great date to me!

Rule #3: This date must be with the intention of properly wooing a guy, and that means doing something that a GUY would consider romantic! A candlelit dinner and walks on the beach and horseback riding through the meadow might sound romantic to women, but to a guy? Not so much! So plan your date with a man in mind, and do it properly!

Rule #4: A fuck date is not a date! Just ripping off clothes and having sex is not a date! You have to properly seduce and woo your man, and no taking the easy way out! Yes, it's true that a lot of guys would be perfectly happy if the date was just sex, but that's because a typical date includes a lot of things guys don't really care about... hence, the rule about creating a proper MANLY kind of date! Done right, your date won't even be thinking about sex during the date. Afterwards, probably... but not during! The point is... no copping out, make it a REAL date!

That's the challenge. Do I have any takers? If so, post a comment telling me, "CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!" and make it happen! Then, post what you did, how the date went, and what you did for your guy.

And, of course.... I'm included in this deal.

Challenge offered! Who's woman enough to accept?

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0 Comments
What Was The Deal With You Leaving, Lion?
Posted:Aug 31, 2016 3:49 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 9:44 pm
62792 Views


As I'm sure the thousands of you that read my blog realized, I left NoStrings about 4 years ago.

Okay, the hundreds that read my blog...

Okay, the dozens....

...

.... let's just move on...

I left out of sheer depression. I hadn't had much luck here (although I DID connect with two old friends from high school, which was awesome), and it was around that time that a beloved pet died. That, plus a few other things I won't get into, all combined into pretty much giving up on NoStrings. It just seemed pointless at the time.

But as you all know, life goes on, and with age comes wisdom. Or God, I hope so, because I'm not getting any younger, and we damn well better get SOMETHING out of this! And with that wisdom comes a certain realization about yourself. For me, that realization was simple.

I was fucking desperate back then, and desperation just isn't attractive.

My problem was my circumstances. I wasn't really doing so well in most aspects of my life, and that cast a pall over me. I was in denial over it, and I believed that, if only I could have a girlfriend or at least an active sex life, everything would get better!

Well... turns out, that's bullshit. As I'm sure many of you already know that, but some of us need a few clubbings over the head in order to figure out certain things. I required several more than was strictly necessary. I can be dense, sometimes.

I'd like to think I'm better now. I'm in a much better place in my life. I'm finally independent, both financially and spiritually, and I no longer NEED someone else in my life to make me feel complete.

That doesn't mean I don't WANT someone in my life, but that desperate need I felt is gone. Purged away in the fire of truth and reality. And thank God... that shit was going nowhere.

SOOOO.... I'm back. And I know exactly what I want from this website, and I intend to get it: from here or from somewhere else.I'm no longer going to compromise and change in order to mold into someone else's expectations. And I'm not going to put up with the nitpicky antics some of the women on here pull.

Sure, the ratio of men to women on here may be overwhelmingly in the women's odds, but ladies... most of the guys on here are pigs. Plain and simple, they're pigs. You get a hundred messages a day from those pigs, I'm sure you don't need me to tell you.

Well, I'm not a pig. I'm a catch. A genuine, honest, decent-looking man with his own money and his life in order. I'm going to treat you right, because that's how I expect to be treated in return. I'm a considerate and experienced lover with a big dick and a fetish for great hair and a woman's orgasms.

And if you start getting uppity and snotty in messages or on this blog, you know what? I deserve better than you. I'm going to drop you in a bucket and move on to the next woman, because I'm the guy most women overlook... the nice guy. And there are plenty of women on here or elsewhere who are looking for a guy like me.

I will not stoop to mediocrity anymore.

So, with that said, if there is a woman on here who is interested in an FWB relationship that may eventually turn into something real and awesome, let me know in the comments or send me a message. And bring your A-Game, because this Lion only accepts quality Lionesses.

The Lion is back. And this time, the roaring is real.

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0 Comments
Where The HELL Have You Been, Lion???
Posted:Aug 26, 2016 9:23 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 9:43 pm
62867 Views
Hello, all. I'm back.

I've done a few adjustments to the blog and to my profile. I've added a year's worth of membership, and this time I added Standard Contacts so anyone can contact me, if they so choose. I'm eager to get started back up again with blogging, and I'm hoping to meet up with a fine lady here at NoStrings.

I won't be adding much to this particular blog... I'll continue writing on it later... but I wanted to tell everyone that I'm back, I'm glad to see so many regulars still going, and I hope to hear from one and all.

The Lion Roars Again.

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0 Comments
...My HEARRRRTS' On Fire.... Elvira!
Posted:Oct 21, 2013 5:28 pm
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2013 8:38 pm
97204 Views
Scratch another one off my bucket list... I finally got to meet Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, in person.

Her actual name is Cassandra Peterson, for those who don't know. And she is still just as hot now as when I crushed on her when I was a . I couldn't take a pic with her when she was in her regular, non-Elvira clothes, for publicity reasons... disappointing, but understandable. But I did get to see her at her Sinema Seance concert at Knott's Berry Farm this year, I got to get her autographed picture, and I got to talk with her before her concert for a while. She's a very nice woman, extremely witty, and I will firmly and undeniably admit that I acted like a drooling idiot-fanboy in front of her. Sigh. What can I say? I don't care if she's 64, I'd be her boy-toy in a heartbeat.

And... I chickened out on asking her for a date. Yes, I'd planned to ask Elvira for a date! Are you kidding? Even if she'd said no, at least I could have said I tried! But when it came down to it, I really didn't have the opportunity, and maybe that's for the best. I mean, she's a vampire, I'm a mortal...

I got some very good pictures of her, but the single pic I got of both her and I together is above... and it's not a very good pic. It almost looks like I'm standing in front of a cardboard cutout, and the ones handling the event insisted that she sit behind that gigantic desk the whole time, even though she said she was happy to pose next to people for their shots. I guess Knott's was being careful with their celebrity... again, understandable, but disappointing.

But at least I finally got to meet the Dark Lady herself. I've had prior opportunities at her shows, but I always missed them. Her handlers keep her pretty wrapped up most of the time. I guess they unclenched their ass-cheeks for this one. I'm glad I got the opportunity to actually meet and talk with her.

Another -crush crossed off the bucket list. I've met and talked with Erin Gray, Daisy Fuentes, and Cassandra Peterson so far. Now I just need to work out a way to meet with Debbie Gibson, Samantha Fox, and Kathy Ireland before I die, and my -crush list will be completed. It's not something I'm going to go out of my way to do, but it would be nice.

How about you? Have you had the opportunity to actually meet and talk with someone famous you had a crush on when you were a ? I don't mean just "Can I have your autograph?", but actually be able to chat with them for a few minutes or more. Maybe you've slept with someone famous? Inquiring minds want to know.

Giddy up, Ah-Oooom-Bop Ah-Ooom-Bop Ah-Maow-Maow....

Yeah, I know that song wasn't about her, but in my mind, it will always about Elvira, Mistress of the Dark.

Hiiiiiii-Yo Silver! A-WAAAYY!

.

0 Comments
The Season of the Witch is... The Season of Love?
Posted:Oct 9, 2013 9:19 am
Last Updated:Oct 21, 2013 4:38 pm
104513 Views
Yes, you read that title right. According to almost every expert on human nature, the autumn time is the time that human beings are most likely to be looking for love. Not exactly what you'd expect, is it?

Apparently, this partly hearkens back to the days of yore, when people didn't even know what the word "yore" meant, and the cavemen and cavewomen drove around in stone cars propelled by their feet, dishwashers were created using tiny mastodons, and people pulled the tails of prehistoric birds to signify the end of their work shift.

No, really... I saw it on the Flintstones, and the Flintstones never lie. Right?

Anyway, back in the days of ancient mankind, winter usually spelled a time of danger and solitude, which meant there would be little to no time to find a mate. This generally carried through to as far as the 1800's, since it's only somewhat modern conveniences that enable us to fully function in winter. Naturally, if they didn't want to spend the winter alone, they would need to "step up their game" and find themselves a mate, pronto. Hence... it became normal for mankind to seriously look for love during autumn.

You'd think it would be spring or summer, right? But that's a time of comfort and play, and it's much easier to live and deal with life and love... there's no desperation involved, so there's no urgency. So our search for love is casual during those seasons, rather than serious and intent. Makes sense to me.

We humans get that instinctual urge to nest and be protected during winter... that urge is natural to mean we want to pair up. The human instinct says that we want our babies to be born in summer rather than winter to give the baby a better chance of survival, so we typically go bonkers in bed in the autumn.

Also, in modern society, autumn spells the beginning of our professional, active lives. School is starting up again, fiscal years are becoming a factor, summer vacations are over, promotions are happening, and the holidays are right around the corner. This means people are gearing themselves up for serious business instead of flirting and frolicking around... but they haven't stopped looking for love, either. So their search for love becomes more intent and serious, too. Instead of just looking for summer romance, they're looking for their Mr. or Ms. Right. After all, no one wants to spend the holidays alone.

And... get this... autumn is our time to be fashion-conscience! In the summer, we're letting it all hang out, which means people are thinking "sex" rather than thinking "love". In the winter, we're bundled up against the cold, so showing off anything really isn't on our minds. But autumn is still cool and warm enough to display our best clothes in the best possible way. It sends the message of "take me seriously" rather than "come hither" or "I'm too freakin' cold to try and entice you". That means we're not only dressed to impress, we're sending the message of "I'm serious about a relationship, not just sex."

I thought that was interesting. Experts say that if you're serious about getting serious with someone, now is the time to get out there and mingle. Perhaps I've quit trying a little too soon...

Comments? Questions? Does this ring any bells with you? As usual, my blog is ready to receive.

Do you think this means that pairing up on A.F.F. will be speeding up or slowing down? Hmmm....

.

1 comment
To Market, To Market, Jiggity Jig.
Posted:Oct 8, 2013 9:28 am
Last Updated:Oct 10, 2013 9:26 am
104649 Views
You may or may not have noticed, but I haven't really been on here much lately. Actually, I haven't been on any of my usual dating sites. I think I'm off the market for a while.

Every time I come to any of my websites for dating or sex or just about anything, I find myself literally slumping in my chair, prepared to open my message box to find nothing again, prepared to search for yet more ladies that I haven't already sent messages to, and prepared to create more messages to send out to them so they can be ignored some more. After months and months of trying here, and years on trying everywhere else, the word "discouraged" would probably be appropriate here.

Even my usual "first date disasters" don't seem to be happening anymore. I don't seem to be able to even get a lady to agree to a first date. I'm not sure what's going on... is it because I'm in shape now, instead of 70 pounds overweight? Is it because I'm gainfully employed now, instead of scraping by? Seriously, I don't get it. I'm doing a LOT better than I was a year ago, and suddenly the pond I'm fishing in has dried up.

My Gold account here just renewed, and my first thought was, "Well, that's money wasted." How bad can things be if I'm thinking like that?

The funny thing is... I'm not really depressed about it. It may sound like it here on this blog, but I'm really not. I'm discouraged, that's very true. But I'm not moping or worried that I'll never find my One True Love or anything like that. I'm just tired of trying and failing.

And here's the other funny thing: it's not like I'm not friendly or I don't have friends at work or don't go out to the gym, but I seem to have two places in my life now: work, and home. If I'm not at work, I'm at home on the computer. While I do tend to spend some time on the computer, that's just about the only thing I do for fun anymore. I haven't found anywhere new to explore in a long time, and I don't have anyone to go do things with or talk to, so I just stay home, do stuff on the computer, watch movies, read my books, and pet my increasingly aging cat.

I guess it's official: I've become a male Cat Lady.

Oh, and my chair broke the other day. The damn back cushion where the pins hold the cushion to the support arm just disintegrated. I've never seen that happen before... I had wood pulp everywhere. I need to get another chair... this time, one that isn't second-hand. For the first time, I have the money to get a decent desk chair. I'll probably do that in the next few days.

I've been told all my life that every time you give up searching, the right person comes along. For the record, that's bullshit. I've stopped searching plenty of times in the past, and no one comes along until I go looking again. Somehow, I don't think that's going to change this time, either. I'm just tired of trying.

Does that mean I've resigned myself to a life of loneliness? God... there's a Lifetime-Movie-of-the-Week.

.

2 Comments
Why Are Men LIKE That? Part III: Answers To Your Questions
Posted:Sep 30, 2013 10:54 am
Last Updated:Dec 22, 2013 4:18 pm
105564 Views
While I don't seem to get many local ladies interested in me, I DO get a lot of ladies hundreds and thousands of miles away from me interested... and most of them really want to know what the deal is with men. Since I tend to be honest, and I think it's better to reveal rather than conceal, I answer any and all questions they field me as best as I can. I'm no Dr. Phil, but I'd like to think I have an insight into humanity.

In that regard, I thought I'd answer several questions I've been getting from you ladies about why we men act the way we do. Since none of these really warrant an entire post, I'm answering several questions. And if you have other questions, feel free to leave a comment or send me a message... I'll do my best.

Question 1: Why are men such babies when they get sick? - While the actual answer is going to depend on your particular man, I can be general about it, because most guys are going to fall into these reasons.

First of all, he's most likely genuinely, seriously sick. Like I've mentioned in the past, most men are taught to "suck it up and drive on", and that includes being sick. This typically means that when he's just feeling under the weather or run down due to a cold or allergies or something, he will ignore it and keep doing what he needs to do rather than take care of himself. If a guy is sick to the point of being stuck in bed and unable to take care of himself, it means he's a lot sicker than you may originally think. Of course, he might be gold-bricking if he's the type, but your run-of-the-mill guy will run himself into the ground before admitting he not able to go anymore.

Also, unlike pain that guys can "power through", sickness goes around our strength and hits us where we can't fight. In other words, we feel helpless against it, and this always makes men feel rotten... we're taught to never allow ourselves to be helpless, and our own bodies (which we depend on) have failed us.

And, of course, it's our chance to be vulnerable, for once. This isn't something we can control, so we feel that it's okay to finally let down our guard around you ladies. We feel the need to be mothered a bit so we'll feel better, just like you do, but unlike you ladies, we men have been trained to believe we're not allowed to feel this way, sooooo.... we don't handle it very well, and we act a little babyish about it. Besides, don't you want to be babied a little when you're sick? Damn sure I don't want to do anything when I'm seriously ill, so I can imagine no one else does, either.

Question 2: Why don't men seem to care about decorating the house? Or fashion? Or the details of our wedding? Or... hell, ANYTHING that makes things look better??? - This is a slightly unfair question, but an understandable one.

We men actually DO care. Well, okay, that's not quite right... we CARE, but not nearly as much as you ladies do. Like any human being, men want to live in beautiful surroundings and clean, well-kept places. We want to be perceived as looking good and having the things around us looking good. And I don't mean "clean"... that should be a given. I mean "looking good". It's an ego thing, admittedly... but are you ladies going to say it's not an ego thing for you, too? I'll call you a liar if you do.

The difference is, again, how we men are brought up. When you think of guys who have style, flair, and a sense of fashion and decor, what do you think of? Gay men, right? While it's a stereotype, it's a stereotype that is rooted in a lot of fact. After all, just about every male fashion expert, home decorator, and wedding planner is gay, or metro-sexual, or acts gay to "fit the image". While being gay isn't really much of a stigma anymore (please don't argue that point; this isn't a political speech, it's a blog... there's no need to nitpick), most straight men don't want anyone to think they're gay... after all, it's isn't "manly", and they want to attract women, not men.

So what do we men do, when confronted with "Honey, what do you think of THIS color?", we tend to respond with neutral or noncommittal comments. If your man says, "I don't know... the robin's egg blue, I guess...", that's not him being an ass or not caring. He cares, and he just made his choice in the most "manly" way he can get away with. And if you were to say "But... I like the royal blue better!", he's probably going to be fine with it. Partly because he doesn't want to argue about something like that, and partly...

He may not really know, and he may genuinely not care. It's not because he's a jerk, it's because men tend to be functional over form. Again, it has to do with upbringing. Most guys aren't taught squat about decorating and fashion... we learn from watching; unlike women, whose mothers take them on weekly clothes-shopping trips and teach them the finer details of life. Men? We follow our fathers to the tools and electronics and such, because those are "manly", they have function, they have purpose beyond eye-candy... and because they're shiny and neat and we like them. But our fathers aren't teaching us about fashion, and mothers don't usually try. After all, it's a girl thing.

Question 3: "Man Up!" Why would a guy get so upset when I say that? - Really? You don't understand that? I had a woman tell me that guys get seriously pissed when she says that, and wanted to know why. Since this is also a pet peeve of mine, I'll explain.

But before I do, get your ass back in the kitchen where you belong!

Didn't like that, huh?

It's about the same thing. Not to be nasty, but you women have no idea what it's like to be a man. None at all. Men have no idea what it's like to be a woman, either. We're quite distinctly different, and we're supposed to be. We're intended to compliment each other, to complete each other, to fill the gaps in each other's holes.

Heh heh... I just realized how that sounded.

One of the most insulting things a woman can tell me is "Man up!" I will look her dead in the eye and tell her to go fuck herself, because she has no idea what she's talking about. A woman who says that to a man has some perfect image of how a man needs to act, firmly latched in her head, and she saying that I don't fit her bill. Well, why the hell should I? Are you fitting MINE? I'm sorry, am I not fitting your White Knight In Shining Armor image you have built up? If we're going to go back to that, put your ballgown back on, hammer on those glass slippers, and go back to knitting and being a useless princess, honey! I was under the impression we're in a liberated society here. Guess what? That means we guys don't have to fit your outdated image of "being a man" anymore than you have to fit a man's outdated image of "being a woman"!

You can't have it both ways. Women gripe and complain how their man isn't sensitive to their feelings; but if they actually FIND a man who is, suddenly he's not MAN enough for her. Women want to be treated as being an "equal to a man", but then cry how men don't hold the door open for her or throw his jacket into a puddle for her to step on. Hey, you asked for it... you got it! Just because you've discovered that being treated like men have been treated for millennia, don't come crying to us about it. You had your chance to remain helpless and mooned over, and you gave it up for equality.

Personally, I think it's for the best. I've always felt that equality is best in any relationship. And I'm not saying all women are like that, because they aren't... in fact, most women have embraced their equality and act quite responsibly and ably. I think it's awesome. Yes, there are some men out there who still hold down that glass ceiling, but there are some people out there who also hold onto racism and every other nasty belief system America tries to wipe out. Hey, it's on the law books and it's enforced EXTREMELY heavily... you really can't expect more than what's been done, outside of prosecuting the individuals who break those laws that are in place.

But "Man up"??? With that phrase, you've just proven that you aren't actually interested in sexual equality at all. With that phrase, you just let the Spoiled Princess out, and removed all of your credibility. You just joined the ranks of those sexist men who love to tell women to "Get back in the kitchen", call women bitches and whores, and slap women around because they have issues. In other words... you're no better than the scum of the earth.

Yeah, it's like that. Don't ever tell me to "Man up". If you don't like who I am and how I act, there's the door. Don't let it hit you in the ass on the way out... I don't want to have to wipe the shit you're full of off of it afterwards.

Sorry... got a little heated there. If I upset anyone with my minor rant there, sorry. You know how irritating pet peeves can be.

Question 4: Why is it always the guys who come up with the weird sexual things? All the most twisted sex things seem to come from men... what's up with that? - Good question, and it deserves a good answer.

Beats the hell out of me.

If I had to guess, it goes back to the same lack of training we men get about dealing with our feelings. Many guys are never taught to deal with their emotions, but we're taught that sex is awesome. So, since for some guys sex is the only outlet they have, and that outlet is ultimately not going to satisfy their need to express their emotions, they're going to start turning to ANYTHING that might be comforting. When it fails, they'll continue falling back on sex, since that's all they know, and the spiral continues. It's similar to how drugs hook you.

But honestly... I really have no idea where some of this weird shit comes from. How anyone can get a sexual thrill from being pissed on, or shoving giant things into their penises, or otherwise self-mutilate themselves in the name of sexual fulfillment... it's beyond me. I might be a little kinky, but some of that shit is seriously twisted. I just don't know. You may need to ask a psychiatrist about that, they'd know more than I would.

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Do you have any questions about men for me to answer? I'm not the know-all, end-all... but I'll try. If they're big questions, I'll likely create another Why Are Men LIKE That? post dedicated to you! If they're minor, I'll just answer them here.

The lines are open. Operators are standing by. CALL NOW!

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4 Comments
Leather
Posted:Sep 26, 2013 12:04 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2013 7:28 pm
98959 Views
Me personally... I love the smell of leather. I cannot walk by a leather store without stopping in just to take a deep sniff of all that leather in one place. I don't wear a lot of it, but I DO have a leather trench coat that I rarely have the opportunity to wear (seriously, where can I wear something like that without looking really out of place?), and I used to have a couple of suede leather jackets I liked... my top blog picture shows me wearing one. Sadly, they've all gone the way of the garbage... destroyed in one way or another. I really need to get another one.

I prefer the suede or rough leather jackets. Those are my favorite. That whole polished leather thing doesn't do it for me... I think the Fonzi look just looks tacky. Black leather looks a little too biker-ish for me. I'm not a biker, and I don't need to pretend I'm a tough guy by wearing the look. But a nice brown leather jacket is perfect. Tasteful, practical, warm when you need it, cool enough when you need it, and if you get the right kind, it can substitute as a minor form of armor, believe it or not.

I can't say I like leather pants... ugh. Who the hell would voluntarily wear leather pants? Hot, sticky, sweaty (and not the good kind), and usually WAY too tight... hey, I'm a big guy down there, and I need room! Tight pants are NOT happening! When is the fashion industry going to make guys decent pants that don't crush our family jewels?

Leather hats... I like them, my family thinks they're stupid. I used to have a big, floppy leather hat I called my Jethro hat. It looked like the kind of hat Jethro from The Beverly Hillbillies wore, and I loved that stupid looking thing. It was my own special brand of silliness that combined with my love of leather. I never once got laid in it. I didn't care. I miss that hat.

Now, a leather fedora? Like something out of the 1930's or 40's? Damn, that's a good look. But they're so pricey! I'm thinking to get one, though... what can I say, I wanted to be Indiana Jones when I was a . Besides, being semi-bald and having to keep my head shaved down... a guy wants a hat. But not a cowboy hat or something like that. I'm not a cowboy, I'm not going to pretend like I am like I see so many other guys do.

Leather belts. Leather wallets. Done. There are no others. Enough said.

Leather shoes or boots. Excellent for working in, and they're nice for going out on the town in. Again, men's fashion needs to get on the ball, because there is a shockingly small selection of leather shoe styles in the world. I'm no fashionista, but... come on, in 200 years, men's footwear has added tennis shoes, and that's it.

Sex that includes leather... I can't say I've had much experience here. Most women I've dated don't get into leather much, and that's fine. It's not like a dealbreaker or something. But I DO think leather looks hot on a woman, and damn sure I love to smell a woman who's wearing it. I've always gotten into the rough-and-tumble women with independent spirits, and leather seems to represent that for the fairer sex. The problem is that unless you look good in leather, you look awful in leather, and women realize that. That, and a lot of people associate women wearing leather with sex, which is something a lot of women try to avoid giving the perception of... at least, in public.

No, no chaps for me. Don't even ask. They look freakin' stupid.

The "Goth Leather" look... okay, I admit, this look hot. I'm not into the whole emo-kill-me-now-black-is-everything-death-is-my-lover kind of weirdo shit that many Goths are into, but I'd be lying through my teeth if I didn't say the look wasn't hot as hell. Black hair, free spirit, leather-wearing Goth Girls... mmmmm.... practically the only reason I still attend the various fantasy and gaming conventions.

I KNOW you people like leather. Admit it. You do. Tell me about it. Right now. And spare no details... this Lion is lonely, and could use a fantasy right about now.

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0 Comments
Romance At The Workplace
Posted:Sep 24, 2013 3:22 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2013 7:27 pm
105562 Views
We hear about it all the time. We see it on TV and in movies. You probably know about at least one or two where you work. Hell, despite your better judgement, you've probably done it in the past, or are even doing it right now.

Dating your co-workers, your boss, or your subordinates. In other words, mixing business with pleasure... the carnal kind.

Now, I've always taken the stance of "Just Say No" when it comes to office romance. Typically speaking, it's just bad news. You're working with someone you're dating, which means you're always with them... this isn't so bad, but a little time apart is actually a good thing for relationships, and you're removing a convenient reason for having that space. There's the serious temptation for fooling around while at work, which can lead to your boss getting a tad upset with both of you.

If you have to do something that conflicts with your paramour, such as turning down a request or needing to concentrate on work when they want to talk or flirt or whatever, or God forbid you have to fire them or a friend of theirs; this can cause some stress on the relationship. If your lover is in sales or modeling or something that requires a great deal of time spent with other people and not you, that can lead to jealousy, irritation, or feelings of being left out... and it can be REALLY bad if your job requires a little or a lot of flirting with to make a sale or convince them to do what you want. Even the best relationships can be tested if he's a porn star and she's a stripper, or he's a salesman and she's an actress, or they're both executives in an advertising company. You get the idea.

And what happens if the relationship doesn't work out? Yikes! Now you're stuck. Short of getting a new job, you're going to be working with this person every single day. Seeing them every single day. Probably talking with them whether you want to or not, having to work with and cooperate with this person that you'd probably rather do ANYTHING ELSE but with. This can be anything from really awkward to horribly violent to distressingly upsetting. Instead of time apart to let your wounds heal, they're being torn open every single day by your forced interaction with the one who broke your heart, or you broke theirs.

But...

I can't help but wonder if it isn't such a bad idea, after all. I mean, one would assume that since you work with this person every day, you've become friends with them... and as any dating expert would tell you, the key to a successful relationship is being their friend first. You're seeing how they are at work, which is likely a different kind of person than when they're out on the town. You get to see someone who isn't "trolling for a date" and instead someone who is doing their job and seeing how they interact with people. Unless they have a job that requires them to "put on a face" for , you get to see them the way they normally are, or at least not at their best like you would if you're meeting for the first time.

Plus, you know they have a job, you can see for yourself their work ethic and their ambition, you can see if they're a trustworthy and honest person by the way they treat others, and you get to see them with their guard down... or at least, partly down. The fact that you have something in common (the job) doesn't hurt when you're lacking dinner conversation. And if you both love your jobs, teaming up to compliment each other's performance can have a very positive result.

And of course, there's the other thing... availability.

Most of us have busy lives. We have jobs, , homes, families, friends, chores, projects... and there are only so many hours in a day. We can go out at night trying to scare up a date, or we can hope to run into an opportunity while we're doing our various errands, but that's firing an arrow blindfolded into a haystack and hoping to hit the needle. If we see someone at work who seems to be pretty decent, most of the flirting and guesswork gets done there. By the time you work up to asking them out on a date (assuming you take the time to do it right, and not just jump at every prospect that comes along), the two of you likely already have decided if you're going to take it the next step.

What was once a pretty firm conviction to never engage in an office romance has become a little shaken, lately. Not that I have my eye on a particular lady at the hospital, but there ARE a great many attractive women that work there... most of which, I see maybe two or three days out of a month, so even if things went sour, it wouldn't be quite so bad.

So I guess I'm wondering... should I open this can of worms? The worms might get out, but you can't go fishing without them, you know?

What do you think? Am I nuts? Is it worth the risk? Have YOU done this sort of thing before? How did it turn out for you? As usual, your comments are welcome.

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1 comment
Breathe... Just Breathe...
Posted:Sep 14, 2013 6:07 pm
Last Updated:Sep 26, 2013 11:24 am
102649 Views

I had a bad day. But frankly, my posts have been a little maudlin and serious lately, so... I decided to post this little list I found called:

Signs That You're Having A Bad Day

A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.
A copy of your birth certificate comes in the mail marked null and void.
Airline food starts to taste good.
Everyone avoids you the morning after the company office party.
Everyone is laughing but you.
Everyone loves your driver's license picture.
It costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.
It takes you three hours to make minute rice.
Nothing you own is actually paid for.
People give you the senior citizen discount and you're only 37.
People send your wife sympathy cards on your anniversary.
The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.
The bride's family throws rocks instead of rice.
The City turns your water off just as you need to rinse the shampoo off your head.
The department of biological warfare ask for your stew recipe.
The fortune teller charges you half price.
The gypsy fortune teller offers to refund your money.
The health inspector condemns your office coffee maker.
The house is messy again before you can finish cleaning.
The Little League puts you on waivers.
The moths in your money belt starved to death.
The movie you rented and couldn’t wait to see was left out of the case.
The pest exterminator crawls under your house and never comes out.
The plumber floats by on your kitchen table.
The restaurant check has been on the table for ten minutes...and no one has touched it.
The worst player on the golf course wants to play you for money.
When you show up at your family reunion, your mom says,"You aren't wearing that to your dad's funeral, are you?"
You are pigging out at McDonald's by yourself and the manager orders the "Number Served" on the sign outside changed.
You call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.
You call your answering service and they tell you it's none of your business.
You can't afford to drive your new car.
You compliment the boss's wife on her unusual perfume and she isn't wearing any.
You discover that your 12-year-old's idea of humor is putting crazy glue in your Preparation H.
You feel like you have a hangover and you weren’t even drinking last night.
You find the melted ice cream all over the bar because you forgot to put it back into the freezer.
You find your 's GI Joe doll dressed in drag.
You get to work and find a "60 Minutes" news team waiting in your office.
You go on your honeymoon to a remote little hotel and the desk clerk, bell hop, and manager have a "Welcome Back" party for your new spouse.
You have an appointment in five minutes, and you just woke up.
You have to borrow from your VISA to pay off your MASTERCARD.
You have to hitch hike to the bank to make your car payment.
You hear the alarm clock ring, and realize you had meant to turn it off.
You invite the peeping Tom in...and he says no.
You look out the window of the airplane and the Goodyear Blimp is gaining on you.
You need one bathroom scale for each foot.
You pulled a muscle when you tried to exercise.
You Push The Coke Button And A Pepsi Comes Out.
You put both contact lenses in the same eye.
You put your bra on backwards and it fits better.
You put your bra on your husband and it fits better on him.
You realize that the phone number on the bathroom wall of the bar is yours.
You realize that you have memorized the back of your cereal box.
You realize that you just sprayed spot remover under your arms instead of deodorant.
You receive a 150-page instruction booklet on how to save money...from the electric company.
You see your stockbroker hitchhiking out of town.
You see your wife and your girlfriend having lunch together.
You step on the talking scales and it says, “One at a time please.”
You take longer to get over sex than you did to have it.
You thought it was a little gas... then…surprise,…your pants are moist.
You turn on the evening news and they are showing emergency routes out of the city, and your house as the epicenter.
You wake up and your braces are stuck together.
You wake up to the soothing sound of running water...and remember that you just bought a waterbed.
You walk to work and find your dress is stuck in the back of your pantyhose.
Your 4-year-old tells you that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit down the toilet.
Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife/ex-husband.
Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat.
Your car payment, house payment, and recently-ex-girlfriend are three months overdue.
Your cat abandons the nice box you prepared for her and has her kittens in your dresser drawer.
Your 's school calls to surrender.
Your computer quits one day over its warranty.
Your doctor tells you that you are allergic to chocolate chip cookies.
Your horn sticks on the freeway behind your local chapter of Hell's Angels.
Your husband secretly wears your bra and enjoys it.
Your income tax refund check bounces.
Your start treating you the same way you treated your parents.
Your mother approves of the person you are dating.
Your new lover calls to tell you "Last night was terrific." And you remember that you were home by yourself.
Your pacemaker has only a thirty day guarantee.
Your plants do better when you don't talk to them.
Your secretary tells you the FBI is on line 1, the DA is on line 2, and CBS is on line 3.
Your suggestion box starts ticking.
Your twin sister forgets your birthday.
Your wife is sitting on the stove holding a picket sign.
Your wife says, "Good morning, Bill" and you have no idea who she's talking about.
Your wife starts charging you rent.
Your wife takes the on vacation and leaves you at the kennels.
Your wife tapes your picture to the dart board.
Your wife wraps your lunch in a road map.
You’re running late and you find out your battery is dead.
You're so bored you play hide & seek alone.
You’re the only one who thought the invitation said "casual".
You've been at work 3 hours before you notice that your fly is open.

And you thought YOU had a bad day. Hope none of these things happened to you today.

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2 Comments

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