One Perspective of Female Orgasm, Explained
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Posted:Nov 28, 2015 4:47 pm
Last Updated:Nov 30, 2015 3:04 pm
8052 Views
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I’ve tried to explain the mechanisms of my orgasm to my husband a couple times now, but every time he’ll end up shaking his head and say, “I don’t get it.” Hopefully, I can explain. It may very well be that I am the only woman in the world for whom it works this way. So while this may be required reading for any potential lover of mine, do not assume this is a guidebook for any other women.
As you hopefully know already, women have two main sexual regions in the genital area: A, the vagina; and B, the clit. Most, maybe 75% of women, cannot orgasm for stimulation of A (ie. penetration) alone. The theory is that this actually has to do with the distance B is from A with the closer spacing correlating to likelihood. So ultimately, orgasm is still dependent on B. But note, the two can operate wholly independent of each other.
For me, A is activated mainly by the brain. Lustful, passionate thoughts will get me wet there. I’ll want nothing more than to feel hard cock inside me rubbing up against my g-spot. However, as one of those 75-percenters, no matter how much I try, I just won’t be able to climax from stimulation of A alone.
On the other hand, B is activated mainly by physical sensation. I mean could be balancing my checkbook, grab my vibrator, cum in two minutes, the go back to balancing my checkbook again like nothing ever happened.
Now, stimulation of A definitely intensifies stimulation of B, but B doesn’t really rely on A. B is nothing but a brief pleasurable break, while A is a state of mind which prevents me from focusing on anything else. Unfortunately, in any LTR, I think sex eventually evolves into the B-focused category.
Which leads me to what I am looking for on NoStrings. Ideally, I want A + B, but if forced to decide between the two, I would choose A over B, as even my vibrator can take care of the latter. This means that great sex doesn’t necessarily involve orgasm. Does this make sense?
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The Lost Art of Seduction
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Posted:Nov 12, 2015 4:32 pm
Last Updated:Nov 20, 2015 11:00 am
8687 Views
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I recently read somewhere that people, especially women, have mostly forgotten the art of seduction. Partially because women typically are the ones being pursued and because of sites like Tinder and NoStrings, it's so easy for us to hookup nowadays. No work necessary. Someone mentioned listening to a radio show where women were invited to call in and attempt to seduce a man. The results were hilariously disastrous.
This is partially why that "site for cheaters" was so appealing. It actually fostered seduction. Marrieds technically already have access to sex, albeit maybe boring sex. Instead they really craved the passion they once had. Because of the clandestine nature of the site, most communication was still via email as husbands couldn't risk receiving texts on their phone. Also everyone's reluctance to post profile photos meant a lot more effort and focus in the written prose. Contrast that with texting. While convenient, lends itself to feeling way too casual instead of intensely passionate.
So how do you seduce someone? I think first and foremost it means being confidently sexy. I think many will agree that confidence is the sexiest quality of all. But I think you also need to show restraint and keep a air of mystery around you. I mean what's a bigger lure than a good enigma to solve?
I've touched on this concept in a previous post. The difference as I mentioned is not revealing everything. Think lingerie ads vs. porn. For example, my profile photos look like boudoir shots more than anything. They are insanely popular. I have been known to get 500+ profile views per day.
There is a fine line between teasing and appearing deceptive though. So for every carrot you dangle in front of someone, be prepared to reveal something equally tantalizing.
I became really good at it. Sometimes it involved games of twenty questions. Sometimes little dares like "I'll show you mine if you show me yours." Sometime it was about exchanging erotic fantasies. It was thrilling to know that you could captivate someone to the point they couldn't sleep or focus on anything while at work... (And they would inappropriately send you proof of that.)
But seduction takes a lot of work and does get tiring if you do it all the time. Luckily there's NoStrings and Tinder to cure that problem.
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Man Walks into a Bar...
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Posted:Nov 10, 2015 6:39 am
Last Updated:Nov 12, 2015 4:26 pm
8299 Views
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I've written so many profiles over the years, all slightly different and tailored to the particular site it was for. Some sites require more personality. I found NoStrings doesn't. In fact, when I did an experiment and stripped away all the text in my profile, leaving just pictures, I got 10x more messages then when I had anything there!
I was thinking about how the Internet has replaced the bar for meeting people, when the "Man walks into a bar..." joke opener popped in my head. Since this is just an alias account, I really didn't give it much thought. For awhile that was the only thing written in my profile so people would comment on it.
Here are some of the replies I've received:
"Man walks into a bar ... and says OUCH!"
"Man walks into a bar huh... He should've ducked."
"Man walks into a bar and eyes attractive woman sitting at the bar half-heartedly sipping on a glass of Chardonnay. In her eyes there's a look that he's seen before."
"The bartender says, 'Why the hard cock sticking out of your pants?' The man says, 'Lys just blew my mind'"
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Coffee Dinner or Drinks
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Posted:Nov 4, 2015 4:10 pm
Last Updated:Nov 13, 2015 4:24 pm
8255 Views
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When a guy wants to meet, he usually proposes one of these three things.
I've concluded what he's really saying is:
Coffee - "It's OK if I don't get laid. I'm a nice guy, and I don't want to pressure you. I might also be open to something more serious," OR "I'm cheating on my wife, so if someone sees me, it'll be easier come up with an excuse."
Dinner - "I'm single and traditional," OR "I'm polyamorous. My wife knows I'm here."
Drinks - "This is strictly casual. In fact, do we even have to go out? Why don't you come straight to my place?"
Am I right?
Take the poll
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Sexy vs. Slutty
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Posted:Oct 31, 2015 12:33 pm
Last Updated:Nov 12, 2015 4:27 pm
3382 Views
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Since today is Halloween, I was thinking about all the sexy costumes making their appearance tonight. I am amused that this is the one night that good girls are allowed to be bad.
A few days ago, I received the latest copy of the Victoria's Secret catalogue. Similarly, I find it ironic how that brand manages to straddle the line between wholesome and dirty. Clearly they're selling sex as opposed to just underwear. Yet, they are wildly popular with stores in just about every major shopping mall. How to they do it? I think they are very careful not to be too porny. They're suggestive, without being explicit, using phrases like "If these walls could talk" and "What a tease. Let's keep this hush hush." I'm also guessing that they probably also make sure they promote a very heteronormative monogamous form of sexuality as well. (I believe they turned down hiring a transsexual model a few years ago.)
In any case, they've succeeded despite America's still popular conservative "family values" image. I think deep down Slutoween and VS really just prove most people are hypocrites.
Come on people, it's OK to admit you're a horndog.
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Workplace Hazards
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Posted:Oct 30, 2015 8:51 am
Last Updated:Nov 17, 2015 7:48 am
3149 Views
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I'm sure we've all run into people we know on these websites. Who's been the most surprising?
How about having your boss hit you up for casual sex? Well that didn't happen to me exactly, but that might have been the case. Talk about an awkward situation. Once I interviewed for a middle-management position at a company I really wanted to work for. A couple weeks later, a high level executive from that company contacted me through a "dating" site. We never met at the time of the interview, so he had no idea whom I was. My profile was sufficiently vague and only contained non-identifiable photos.
I know it was wrong of me to even imagine, but I couldn't help wonder, if he would offer to pull some strings for me. So I replied to him, and we chatted for a bit. I didn't make any suggestions. I just pointed out that it was a weird coincidence to find him there. Smartly, he didn't offer to do anything majorly unethical. However, he still tried to get me to meet him. I declined.
I did not get hired in the end. But what if i had been? Would I have been able to work there knowing what I knew, even if I never revealed myself to the guy as that woman? Would it have been a sexual harassment lawsuit just waiting to happen?
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Loose Lips Sink Ships
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Posted:Oct 29, 2015 10:03 am
Last Updated:Nov 15, 2015 8:45 pm
3059 Views
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I shouldn't be writing this. The more I open my mouth, the more likely I am to get in trouble.
We'll see how it goes. I may decide that this is a bad idea and pull the plug.
I'd like to test the waters first, before I get too confessional. So I'll start with some generic musings. Like wondering why people don't follow directions? I have another profile on this site with slightly altered info that gets a lot of attention. (I'm blogging under this one because I don't want too many dots connected that would give away my identity.) I list a few requirements in that one, including asking for a face photo sent to me privately if you don't have one posted. But 90% of messages don't include one. I know women gripe about this all the time, but I haven't heard a good answer from the other side yet. I genuinely want to know why you are wasting your time?
Look at it from my point of view. I get tons of messages. Most contain headless torsos and dick pics, and "Hi" as the entire message. Maybe only once or twice have I ever thought, "that's an unbelievably beautiful cock." And then it was probably heavily influenced by the fact that it was attached to a equally unbelievably beautiful face. After awhile all of these body parts look more or less the same. How am I supposed to tell people apart? While I love casual sex (my favorite is the one night stand with a visitor,) I still got to be attracted to you first. I need to get a sense of a person, and that includes more than their genitals.
Bottom line is I have enough options, so I'm not going to do the legwork just because you didn't follow directions. Also the fact that you can't do something simple isn't a good sign. It probably means you're not likely to follow directions in bed. 
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