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Fucking making love...
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Fucking making love... Why we care, why we're here, return on investment... suckers and fuckers. Speaking only for myself, I know I'm looking for many things. If I'm going to be single - without that one great love, soul mate, etc., I'm also going to live. As a sexual being, a man full of passion and perspicacity, I want to enjoy the pleasure derived from being an open, sexual being.  I rarely fuck, but I have. I don't have anything against fucking, but prefer to make love. Even when I am fucking, in so many ways, I'm still making love - I'm never absent, unconcerned with my partner's pleasure, selfish, but really appreciate it when the woman I'm fucking feels the same, and reciprocates. Most of us have watched videos of people fucking, a whole lot of wasted time taking pictures of nothing, of boredom, of dark shadowy movement, of fumbling pretenders who haven't figured out how to enjoy their gift (of each other) while taking pictures. Much of that material is mechanical yawn-inducing pumping. Even blow jobs are often performed as an afterthought. I watch women going down on men and think... 'he's not feeling anything' - those videos where five minutes into the blowjob he's barely moved, or is checking his texts, and you see the video cut to a new frame and he has his cock in hand and is jerking while standing over her open mouth whining like she wants to get her hair dirty. Ugh... for the sake of what? Boredom?  When fucking, I want the woman I'm with to reach for my cock, and love it, caress it, slip her lips over its head, maybe suck and slide down deep, and so far I can only imagine a true deepthroat. See my past blog posts for more on this - the real deal vs. the boring deal. She needs to put careful pressure on it, to vary the pressure, to squeeze my balls gently (with knowledge please), to press beneath my balls, to push, suck, pull, and squeeze. Even a very experienced recent lover did not give a very good blowjob, because her focus was on me cumming, not on my pleasure. She'd probably appreciate knowing that. Anal sex is not for everyone, and I've had good and terrible anal sex as the giver. It's terrible when a woman is just OK with it, not embracing the sensations, or worse than anything, doing it for me. All those wonderful feelings of being squeezed so tightly, and occasionally cumming inside with abandon are arousing just to think about, except if she's not enjoying... I'm not enjoying and come away empty... in both the good and the bad way.  Many of us spend a lot of time here watching, hoping, sometimes communicating, often hoping to catch another's eye. Some come here knowing their rarity and can get anything they want, young and 'beautiful' women, for example can pick from thousands of men in any modest city. I get a sense that even they do not get what they want, but some shadow of what they're looking for. It's rare that a person is open and liberal enough to be able to love individuals in the precise moment in which they are interacting, instead being distracted either by their regular relationships, concern for what others might think, self doubt, or societal expectations, one man, one woman. Broken down to the basest elements, we are faulted humans with physical mechanisms that bring pleasure and pain. Exercising our pleasure rights should be natural and unencumbered by ancient, poorly interpreted, written words. We should give and take - give what we know feels good, and what we've learned another person craves. Get what feels good, by communicating our desires to others. Among crowds of people, I often remind myself that the crowd is full of sexual beings. I'd not be able to tap a woman on the shoulder and suggest we go into the bathroom and fuck, but I know in a room where we'd all agreed to speak openly and honestly, perhaps in an academic research setting, that those people would admit to wanting more pleasure from their bodies, more interaction with others, and I'm certain most if not all would have desires they've never expressed. Nothing is taboo - really, wearing diapers and sucking a pacifier is one's choice, but it's not taboo. Sex among stuffed animals? Meh... I can think of acts or kinks that are just plain wrong, and often associated with drug addiction, mental illness, or abuse or true slavery, but those acts are not taboo, they're simply aberrations among starving, bereft people. Those who engage mindfully in kinks are acting, and enjoy the act. Nothing taboo there.  Time spent here trying to strike up conversations, to find compatriots interested in both passionate sex, intelligent repartee, and creative adventure has shown me that the system for bringing us together... is broken. It should be easier as we're all looking. In part this is because so many people who have needs and wants would never come here looking - it's a bit sketchy with all the wide open beavers and too many dick pics... who ever came up with the notion that showing one's junk is attractive? We're typically more turned on by the mystery of our interactions than blatancy... a well known fact. Do you spend 'WAY TOO MUCH TIME' here? Sometimes I do, but not often enough to be concerned. I still get my work done, go out and be among people, and clean my house. |
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Now it's your turn to write more than five words. I've thought about creating a meetup group for people near me - try to get all of us together in one place to face the fact that we're all looking for something. How complex that would be, but also VERY interesting!
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Last question - Why do so few people read older blog posts? I have 25 posts here, and on an old account another 50 or so... rarely read by anyone. My theory is 'instant gratification' - the way grocers turn bruised fruit's good side to face the shopper, because people will buy it if the bruise is on the back of the fruit.
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I really love what you wrote and it resonates with me. I feel everything with all of my senses flying high like they do. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and wisdom!
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