Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > rm_MarlenaM > I am not a saint! |
A question for married, attached and involved men.
|
A question for married, attached and involved men. Do your wives/partners know you are in "a loveless, sexless relationship"? 
|
|||
2/4/2020 5:48 am |
Not loveless......just sexless
| ||
|
Yes. We have even been to counselling. She just cant seem to want or enjoy sex at all. We have tried, and I dont want to divorce over just physical things. She doesnt want to divorce becaise "Im always asking for sex"....so I am in a catch 22. Marriage is a vow, an oath, but there are needs both need to fulfill too. Just my opinion.
| ||
|
Yes. We have even been to counselling. She just cant seem to want or enjoy sex at all. We have tried, and I dont want to divorce over just physical things. She doesnt want to divorce becaise "Im always asking for sex"....so I am in a catch 22. Marriage is a vow, an oath, but there are needs both need to fulfill too. Just my opinion. Read that to yourself SLOWLY until you figure it out... "Marriage is a vow, an oath." Hypocrite much?
| ||
|
Not loveless......just sexless I will amend my post. 
| ||
|
Im with IamwhatIam. Sexless, not loveless. Yes, it does bother me that Im on this site...but I bet a lot of married people probably think it's harmless fun. I. However, am like the scorpion wanting a ride across the river on the frogs back....sometimes you just cant change who you are, no matter how much you want to.
| ||
|
Im with IamwhatIam. Sexless, not loveless. Yes, it does bother me that Im on this site...but I bet a lot of married people probably think it's harmless fun. I. However, am like the scorpion wanting a ride across the river on the frogs back....sometimes you just cant change who you are, no matter how much you want to. It's your mirror, you HAVE to face that reflection. Not my circus, not my monkeys UNTIL I get messages from your ilk.
| ||
2/4/2020 9:05 am |
When your in a sexless marriage that doesnt mean you dont love your spouse.
| ||
|
Just to let you know, i have not acted on my needs, have not been with anyone. I come in, to chat, and blog. So i may be a hypocrite in my mind and heart, but not in action.
| ||
2/4/2020 9:42 am |
Was on this site for a couple of years in secret. Wife didn't know. We had sex 2-3 a month and it was pretty vanilla. She wasn't into it. I tried everything I could to spark the romance. Dates, massages, baths, trips.... I tried everything BUT the most important thing of all..... Communication! Don't get me wrong, I tried to talk with her about it - and not from a demanding position. I wanted to know what was wrong. Why was she not interested. Was it me? what could I do? I suggested counseling... she wouldn't. Eventually I gave up and started to surf porn sites (this one included). I engaged in countless conversations and eventually met someone and found a release/outlet. Felt terrible about it and hid it for a few years. My position in the community, career, etc. were hugh profile and I couldn't risk being exposed..... after a few years, I disclosed it all. That was a couple of years ago. Over the last couple of years both of us sought thorough counseling and learned a lot. Changed a lot. Grew a lot. She wants to remain married and work thru it all. I am done. I wish I had insisted we do counseling years ago.... might have saved our marriage. Hookups, naughty chats, flirting, all of the above will never satisfy that black hole that led us here. I have learned that over the past few years. The wife knew things weren't good. She blamed me for most of the problems. It wasn't until she went thru a year of counseling that she actually owned her own issues and began making changes. I committed to working on my sstuff and she, hers. Who knows where we both will end up in the future, but even tho it's been the hardest season to endure, it's been the best thing that could have happened to each of us.... If anyone reading this is still lingering in the shadows.... still lying, cheating, manipulating, gas-lighting and grooming others, STOP while you still can! Sit down and have a heart-to-heart with the spouse and lay it out! Make those decisions now - while you still can - or the decisions will be made for you later! You can't hide this stuff forever. It will eventually catch up with you and your life will become a serious "shit-show". I promise. Greater people than I have gone this route before me and I wish I had learned from them.... but I was too stubborn and prideful.
| ||
|
Was on this site for a couple of years in secret. Wife didn't know. We had sex 2-3 a month and it was pretty vanilla. She wasn't into it. I tried everything I could to spark the romance. Dates, massages, baths, trips.... I tried everything BUT the most important thing of all..... Communication! Don't get me wrong, I tried to talk with her about it - and not from a demanding position. I wanted to know what was wrong. Why was she not interested. Was it me? what could I do? I suggested counseling... she wouldn't. Eventually I gave up and started to surf porn sites (this one included). I engaged in countless conversations and eventually met someone and found a release/outlet. Felt terrible about it and hid it for a few years. My position in the community, career, etc. were hugh profile and I couldn't risk being exposed..... after a few years, I disclosed it all. That was a couple of years ago. Over the last couple of years both of us sought thorough counseling and learned a lot. Changed a lot. Grew a lot. She wants to remain married and work thru it all. I am done. I wish I had insisted we do counseling years ago.... might have saved our marriage. Hookups, naughty chats, flirting, all of the above will never satisfy that black hole that led us here. I have learned that over the past few years. The wife knew things weren't good. She blamed me for most of the problems. It wasn't until she went thru a year of counseling that she actually owned her own issues and began making changes. I committed to working on my sstuff and she, hers. Who knows where we both will end up in the future, but even tho it's been the hardest season to endure, it's been the best thing that could have happened to each of us.... If anyone reading this is still lingering in the shadows.... still lying, cheating, manipulating, gas-lighting and grooming others, STOP while you still can! Sit down and have a heart-to-heart with the spouse and lay it out! Make those decisions now - while you still can - or the decisions will be made for you later! You can't hide this stuff forever. It will eventually catch up with you and your life will become a serious "shit-show". I promise. Greater people than I have gone this route before me and I wish I had learned from them.... but I was too stubborn and prideful. Thank you for your feedback and your cold hard honesty. 
| ||
|
I love my job but I'm not married to it. I'm not jamming anyone for their side activities, merely asked "does your wife know?"
| ||
|
Just to let you know, i have not acted on my needs, have not been with anyone. I come in, to chat, and blog. So i may be a hypocrite in my mind and heart, but not in action. Merely asked... Does your wife/partner know?
| ||
|
When your in a sexless marriage that doesnt mean you dont love your spouse. Merely asked "does your wife/partner know?
| ||
|
Exactly this. Several (many) years ago my 1st husband and I separated for a few months, during which time he sexed up another young woman. After he and I reconciled, she called our house asking to speak with him. When he refused to get on the phone, I told, very kindly, that we had reconciled and he said he had nothing to say. I was so effing angry that he wouldn't at least tell this woman goodbye. I remember apologizing for "my husband's poor treatment of you and his current behavior. I'm sorry my husband lied to you", poor woman started crying and I could hear the pain and confusion in her voice when she said "he promised me he wouldn't get back with you"... I genuinely felt terrible. Bastard husband.
| ||
2/5/2020 6:02 am |
Yes and she doesn’t care
| ||
|
My Partner AKA Significant Other; Knows !! In a nutshell, hopefully ! I lost my wife in an auto accident numerous years ago ! After a while of course; I began playing the field! I met a gal; who evolved into a FWB! She eventually moved in with me with the mutual understanding that we wouldn't marry ! We lived together as if we were married; even sharing the bed . At one point she developed a female related problem. After many appointments with an OB/GYN to No resolve! The last option was to have a total and complete hysterectomy ! After time of recovery; she confided in me that she had lost any desire or interest in sex ! OB/GYN said; it was a possible after-effect of the surgery ! Not realizing the time of day;she got home from work and walked into the bedroom and caught me masturbating ! She confided that she understood that I still had sexual wants and needs ! She suggested that I find another FWB or NSA relationship ! Her stipulations were that I keep it discrete and not bring a conquest into the home ! Hence; the reason I'm on this site ! And; Yes; after eight years, We are still together but pickins are getting far and few !!
| ||
|
My Partner AKA Significant Other; Knows !! In a nutshell, hopefully ! I lost my wife in an auto accident numerous years ago ! After a while of course; I began playing the field! I met a gal; who evolved into a FWB! She eventually moved in with me with the mutual understanding that we wouldn't marry ! We lived together as if we were married; even sharing the bed . At one point she developed a female related problem. After many appointments with an OB/GYN to No resolve! The last option was to have a total and complete hysterectomy ! After time of recovery; she confided in me that she had lost any desire or interest in sex ! OB/GYN said; it was a possible after-effect of the surgery ! Not realizing the time of day;she got home from work and walked into the bedroom and caught me masturbating ! She confided that she understood that I still had sexual wants and needs ! She suggested that I find another FWB or NSA relationship ! Her stipulations were that I keep it discrete and not bring a conquest into the home ! Hence; the reason I'm on this site ! And; Yes; after eight years, We are still together but pickins are getting far and few !!
| ||
|
The deep Love for each other is still there !! Just no sex !! We still do things such as ;hug , kiss , sit snuggled together under a blanket ; her in bra & panty & me in underwear; watching a movie or tv !! We've even on " rare " occasions ; with her prompting it ; taken a shower together and wash each other !! I know my limits in this respect as we have discussed it !! It's not very often but IF she starts washing my genitals ; I in turn wash hers !! Not that she feels Horny but IF that turns into her masturbating me ; Then I in turn am allowed to rub her tits !! As I get close to cumming ; I let her know and she will then step out of the shower for me too finish !! She does not care to watch me cum !! She is incapable of full arousal and cumming !! Those are some of the ways we show our love and intimacy with each other !! Hope this helps you understand the relationship that we enjoy !!
| ||
|
The deep Love for each other is still there !! Just no sex !! We still do things such as ;hug , kiss , sit snuggled together under a blanket ; her in bra & panty & me in underwear; watching a movie or tv !! We've even on " rare " occasions ; with her prompting it ; taken a shower together and wash each other !! I know my limits in this respect as we have discussed it !! It's not very often but IF she starts washing my genitals ; I in turn wash hers !! Not that she feels Horny but IF that turns into her masturbating me ; Then I in turn am allowed to rub her tits !! As I get close to cumming ; I let her know and she will then step out of the shower for me too finish !! She does not care to watch me cum !! She is incapable of full arousal and cumming !! Those are some of the ways we show our love and intimacy with each other !! Hope this helps you understand the relationship that we enjoy !! Your relationship is not for me to understand... Do YOU understand it?
| ||
|
"needs intense therapy " ?????? Have you ever heard of ; LOVING , OPEN , RELATIONSHIPS !!!!!!
| ||
|
"needs intense therapy " ?????? Have you ever heard of ; LOVING , OPEN , RELATIONSHIPS !!!!!! Or do you just not give a crap because you are using it to give yourself license to get some strange at your heart's content? Smfh... "Loving, open, relationships"? My ass.
| ||
|
Reread my post on 2/5/2020 explaining her SURGERY !!!!
| ||
|
Reread my post on 2/5/2020 explaining her SURGERY !!!! You're pretty intense about explaining yourself. I mean how many exclamation points do you need?
|
Become a member to create a blog
