1448 posts 4/12/2017 8:39 am
Last Read:
2/3/2023 3:30 am
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91 Days on here...
Today is the 91st day I have been on here, since coming back after a 7 year absence. 34 blog posts later, 170 readable and replied messages, 4 new friends, 4 top fans, a date in the bag, in 2 weeks time, 2 promising gals, for meetings in the near future, viewed 1000+ profiles ( only on the drop down mini profile box ) been viewed 180 times. That is quite good for a 54yo man who is a standard member, don't you think?
A big big thanx to my few selective friends, viewers, watchers, those who leave comments, and my fans! You have put me on the "most active" blogs page in the UK. My fans, you have put me quite high up on the "popular members", ( 1st in Middlesex! With a badge! Yeehaw!) I just wanted to tell you I appreciate it, and thanx again! I never set out for the last two, but I will not lie, it feels great! A mental hard on! When I win that lottery, I will be leasing a little Greek island ( as they are never for sale ) in the middle of the Aegean sea. I will be buying an internet title. I will be known as prince philosopher the 1st, or something! My island will be run as a municipality, a state within a state, with it's own laws and regulations.( Still to be made, so suggestions please...when the time comes ) And you will all be personally invited, to stay for as long as you wish!
This post is dedicated to all of you mentioned above.
A day in the life of an NoStrings addict.
07.00 Wake up, turn computer on, go shower and shave.
07.30 Look at the bottom of the screen for e-mailed notifications.
07.31 Read mailed notifications and delete.
07.33 Log in. Check who viewed me, check my blog, check where I am quoted, check recent posts, leave comments.
07.45 Get dressed.
07.50 Make coffee.
08.00 Check where I am quoted.
08.05 Have breakfast, on a tray, on my knees, in front of computer.
08.15 Check who viewed me, my blog, where I am quoted, recent posts, leave comments. Check if any of my friends are on IM.
08.30 View top members, in Middlesex, in England, in UK.
08.35 Log out.
08.40 Get a notification e-mail.
08.41 Log in. Check who viewed me, check my blog, check recent posts, leave comments.
08.42 Log out.
08.43 Have a smoke with the last of the coffee from the kilo made earlier.
08.45 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
08.46 Log in. Check who viewed me, check IM, where I am quoted, recent posts, leave comments.
09.00 Remember I need to send some important e-mails.
09.01 Log out.
09.10 Finish with the important mails.
09.11 Look at my home page, the news, my eBay selling account, funny videos on the tube.
09.15 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
09.16 Log in. Check who viewed me, recent posts, leave comments.
09.20 Go read old messages.
09.35 Go read my old blog posts and comments.
09.50 Check who viewed me, my blog, where I am quoted, recent posts, leave comments.
10.00 Log out.
10.01 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms. Decide to fight back.
10.02 Play gin rummy, backgammon, with computer. Win neither.
10.20 Discover fighting back does not work.
10.21 Log in. Check who viewed me, my blog, where I am quoted, recent posts, leave comments. Check the chat rooms.
10.30 See live broadcasting members.
10.31 Decide if I want to have some "safe sex".
10.45 Discover I run out of tissues last night.
10.46 Log out.
10.47 Go back to the bathroom for a quick wash.
11.00 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
11.01 Log in. Check who viewed me, my blog, IM, recent posts, leave comments.
11.10 View my own profile.
11.15 Remember I need to go food shopping or starve to death.
11.16 Log out.
11.20 Do supermarket shopping. Check the hotties at the cosmetics aisles. Go and pay on the prettiest cashiers till.
11.30 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
11.31 Log in. Check IM and chat rooms, recent posts, leave comments.
11.45 Think what to blog about today. Who ever joined up on here and thought "mmm, blogs"
12.00 Open notepad and start typing.
12.05 Delete everything and start again.
12.10 Save notepad and close.
12.11 Check who viewed me, my blog, where I am quoted, recent posts.
12.20 Log out.
12.21 Watch the news from the Greek channel.
12.51 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
12.52 Decide to fight back. Play another session of gin rummy.
13.00 Find out that fighting back does not work, again.
13.01 Log in. Check recent posts, leave comments. Reply to messages.
13.15 View flashing message on computer screen. It says "You have been online for a year. Do you wish to log off and get a life?"
13.16 Click on the "not now" button on screen message.
13.17 Check who viewed me, my blog, where I am quoted.
13.20 View top members, in Middlesex, in England, in UK. View my own profile.
13.30 Check who is broadcasting live.
13.35 Open new box of tissues, just in case.
13.45 Log out. Visit bathroom again.
13.48 Decide if I want to have lunch, or check on my blog, again.
13.50 Have a quick sandwich.
14.00 Log in. Check where I am quoted, recent posts, leave comments.
14.30 Remember I am meeting one of my daughters.
14.31 Log out.
14.32 Get in car and start driving.
14.33 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
15.00 Meet the .
16.30 Chat about my blog, online friends.
17.30 Log in. Check my blog, where I am quoted, recent posts, leave comments. Reply to messages.
17.50 Get everything ready I need for a long evening in front of the monitor. Food, water, candy, tissues. All ready, here we go!
17.55 Change in to dressing gown.
18.00 Check the chat rooms. Start chatting with woman named party knickers. Ask her if there is a party going on, and if I am invited.
18.10 Ask party knickers to a private chat room so we can be more comfortable.
18.25 Party knickers and I are getting it on. In real life this would be considered foreplay.
20.25 Finish up with party knickers.
20.26 Check who viewed me, who is online, in UK, in Greece, in France.
20.35 Do some online stalking. Visit blogs page, read comments, time posted.
20.45 Have a smoke and a beer.
20.40 Log out. Watch more news, local, Greek.
21.20 Start feeling withdrawal symptoms.
21.25 Log in. Go read some blogs.
23.55 Wake up with qwerty inscribed on my forehead.
24.00 Log out. Kiss my monitor good night, turn computer off, go to bed, and dream about NoStrings.
And a couple of online dating jokes
"DICTIONARY OF DATING"
DATING: The process of spending<b> enormous </font></b>amounts of money, time, and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.
EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man.
EYE CONTACT: A method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many women have difficulty looking a man directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to the shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest.
FRIEND: A member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.
INDIFFERENCE: A woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man as "playing hard to get."
IRRITATING HABIT: What the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.
NYMPHOMANIAC: A man's term for a woman who wants to do it more often than he does.
SOBER: A condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.
ATTRACTION: The act of associating horniness with a particular person.
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: What occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet.
LAW OF RELATIVITY: How attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.
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MEN ON LINE
Men Online Hall of Shame
The Player
This guy just sends out messages and chats online practically full time. As soon as he gets you in the sack , he is on to his next conquest. He is slick , I hope you recognize him. In retrospect you are quite relieved you insisted on a condom despite the intense pressure and questionable "latex allergy" excuse.
The Instant Relationship Guy
This guy tells you all sorts of bs ...I met you and pulled my profile ... Where have you been all my life ... I want to take you to my business trip to Europe with me ... I am falling for you ... I think you are going to marry me ... You are so amazing , etc etc. Wear hip waders, the shit is deep.
The Liar
Similar to the above guy, but these types are more creative, with a wider range of lies ... they will lie about their age , height (like you would not notice? ) , where they live, marital status, job, whether they smoke or not, whether they have or not, if they are dating someone else, etc. Do not forget the classic ...I will call you . Basically, you can tell if they are lying , their lips are moving. They are the most common type found online.
The Dumb Guy
Poor bastard could not spell if his life depended on it. Too clueless to run spell check on his 5 sentence profile. I like purty gurls. No punctuation. Even misspells his profession , how scary is that ?
The One Good Picture Guy
Just has one good picture from the right angle that makes him look acceptably cute. Does not look like that at all in person. Frustrating when you had agreed to meet him for dinner and it ends up Dutch. He should pay just for the inconvenience of his misrepresentation.
The Ugly Guy That Wants a Supermodel
Annoying , the guy somehow reached 35 not knowing that he is a 4 out of 10. Constantly sends emails and instant messages the hot chicks, the 7 to 10 out of 10. Would never have the courage to approach them out in public, subconsciously knows they are out of his league. WHY don't you want to date me ? Sorry, you are not my type. What is your type ? etc etc.
The Intolerant Guy
This guy is abusive if you do not agree with his religious beliefs, etc. Or will tell you that you are weird if there is something about you that he does not understand. An insensitive prick. Does not really like women that have opinions , on anything.
The Sketchy Guy
The only thing you find out about this guy is his license plate number and cell number. You will date this guy quite a few times but will never find out any personal information about the elusive sketchy guy. You will never know his last name, see where he lives, or know where he works. You will never meet any of his friends, coworkers or family. Nothing, nada, zilch, zippo. You will wonder if he did exist at all.
The Retro In A Bad Way Guy
I think it is the mustache from hell. This guy desperately needs a Queer Eye makeover. Has not shopped for new clothes in so long that he is a sad case. Has potential, if you have the patience.
The Bitter Divorced Guy
This guy bitches about his ex, how she spent all his money, he never gets to see his , she cheated, she was such a cow, never gave him a blow job, etc etc. Waiter, bucket full of bitter, please. This guy is devoid of any positive thoughts, and emotionally unavailable. Suitable for dating robots.
The Dad
Unfortunately the only time this guy gets to see his is on the weekends, which coincides with when you want to go out and have a fun date with him. Always says ... my beautiful 4 yr old , etc. Why doesn't anyone ever say, my ugly little brat with behavioral problems . Indulges his every whim because of divorce guilt. Unfortunately the ex does too, and Junior pays the price.
The No Sex Drive Guy
Good sex at first but then loses interest. Forgets to mention that he is now on anti depressants, which has killed his sex drive completely. Do not take it personally , the Limp Noodle is not because of you. Good thing you stumbled upon them in the bathroom cabinet when you were looking for the soap .
The Cel Phone/Blackberry Guy
So attached to his device he does not even know how to turn it off. Face has odd green glow from peering over that little screen every time you are not looking, go to the washroom, etc. This shifty eyed techno addict has the attention span of a mosquito. Usually jumpy and hopped up on coffee too.
The Horny Webcam Guy
Very soon into your chat with horny guy, he will suggest that you chat on camera, show you his abs, and ask if you have a camera. Never seems to actually date, always online looking for fresh fantasy material.
The Freaky Foot Fetish Guy
2 seconds into chatting he will ask you what your feet look like. After 2 polite questions feigning interest in your profession/personality/picture, asks if you like your feet worshipped, licked, or covered with cum. A tad too intimate too soon.
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 8:40 am |
Does anything on here give you a "mental" hard on?
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Omg..this is great.. I loved it..so true to in so many ways..And congrats on your 91st day back. This place can be very addicting..
Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on.. 
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 9:08 am |
Quoting Tmptrzz:
Omg..this is great.. I loved it..so true to in so many ways..And congrats on your 91st day back. This place can be very addicting..
Thanx tmptrzz. You are on the invitations list! Thanx for the visit and comment!
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 9:23 am |
Hey playtime. It is not very minimal, dang! Takes the whole page  I do try to avoid long posts, but I have so much to say! Thanx for your visit and comment!
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41171 posts 4/12/2017 10:34 am |
91 days! That means you've been laid 91 times otherwise the site's 'get laid tonight' promise is worthless! 
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10 posts 4/12/2017 10:51 am |
Love your blog, unfortunately it's true but I can't keep away, like Tmptrzz said, it's very addictive
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 10:51 am |
Quoting spunkycumfun:
91 days! That means you've been laid 91 times otherwise the site's 'get laid tonight' promise is worthless!
Hi spunky! That statistic is for the gold members. Us standards get the same but in "safe sex" terms! But I have a date in the bag, soon. Let me think now 91X 5 minutes, looks like I can catch up in about 7-8 hours
Thanx for visiting and your comment!
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 11:00 am |
Quoting lindafuckmejet:
Love your blog, unfortunately it's true but I can't keep away, like Tmptrzz said, it's very addictive
Hi linda. How did I ever manage to abstain from here for a whole 7 years, not even I know! Well, I do really. I am an extreme man, all or nothing. So since coming back, I don't need a house no more. I just have been living in here!
Thanx for your visit and comment!!
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 1:33 pm |
Hey zara_thustra. Wow. 12 years. A well seasoned member! No blogs? A very quiet place those days. I must admit I came back on here, looking for a woman, or even two, but the blogs are the meaty gritty! Look at me, have not even bothered to join up, to be able to send messages and do searches. I do not know any other sites offering the blogging to standard members. And I also find the people in here more upfront and honest with themselves and others, as opposed to the "vanilla" sites. It is a great place, when everything works. I love it. Thanx for your welcome, the visit and your comment!
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9800 posts 4/12/2017 1:43 pm |
I never really figured you for a guy basher but
whatever works is the name of this game.
Using more than all the road!
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20051 posts 4/12/2017 1:53 pm |
Happy 91 days.
kk
The observant make the best lovers, I may not do right, but I do write, I have bliss, joy, and happiness in my life, Kitkat Come check out my blog KItkat1415check out this post by me Adventures In Body Grooming#39 April Topic Link: What Lies BeneathIf April Showers Oh Bloody Hell What Kind Of Weather Turns Me On Bloggers Symposium 40
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 2:01 pm |
Quoting s2ndegree:
I never really figured you for a guy basher but
whatever works is the name of this game.
Hi s2ndegree. You know there are some who well deserve it. The ladies bash is for another post! Nice to see you around here. Thanx for popping by and your comment.
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 2:05 pm |
Hey kitkat. Many thanx! This is going better than expected, the second time around! I been living in here since January! Keeps me out of trouble, has not cost me nothing yet, and got a date in the bag, and 2 to look forward. What else could I want! I might leave the house and move in.
Thanx for popping in and your comment.
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23580 posts 4/12/2017 2:31 pm |
I heard there is a 12 step program for what you've described. You may want to start with 36 steps. 
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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4077 posts 4/12/2017 2:41 pm |
Quoting redrockrascal:
I heard there is a 12 step program for what you've described. You may want to start with 36 steps.
Hey redrock. I think 48 would be best. I am a slow learner! Or just find a woman to keep me out of here, instead. Thanx for visiting and commenting!
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4077 posts 4/13/2017 1:58 am |
Hi hinj1 ! Thanx. A multi poster? What a great idea! Do you think I can start downloading shite from the net, pictures of women maybe, and start posting 8 times every day? Wow! How come I never thought of that? Up the quality of my blog content that way as well. I don't think anybody has done that yet!
Thanx for visiting and your comment!
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4077 posts 4/13/2017 2:15 am |
Thanx author! A smile is a good way to start the day. And continue, till bed time But waking up with me next to you is even better!!! You are a lucky lady, for having met all of these men online! At least you know what to not put on your bucket list. Of course a woman bashing post or joke has to come soon, so I am not perceived as a man-basher only! Thanx for popping by and commenting.
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16552 posts 4/13/2017 2:40 am |
Congratulations. 
( not sure why 91 days is special, though...  )
But YOU like it...
I've been here since 2005... 
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4077 posts 4/13/2017 2:53 am |
Quoting goodatpoetry2:
Congratulations.
( not sure why 91 days is special, though... )
But YOU like it...
I've been here since 2005...
Hi goodatpoetry. Thanx! Every day on here is a special day. I actually wrote this on the 90th day, the 3 month mark, but took so long, decided to post it the next day.
A member since '05? I bet you got some good stories to tell! Thanx for dropping by and your comment.
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4077 posts 4/13/2017 9:49 am |
Hey resident. Thanx! 91 profiles There is a name for that.....
Dissociative identity disorder (previously known as multiple personality disorder) is thought to be a complex psychological condition that is likely caused by many factors, mainly idiocy for those with 91 profiles on here. And extremely boring, as it is only the name that changes, while profile content stays the same! Thanx for popping by and the comment.
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4077 posts 4/13/2017 10:33 am |
Well then, clearly it is a different man, a changed person, if it contains so much change as _
How the brain, or luck of it works! Fascinating!!
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7262 posts 4/13/2017 7:12 pm |
You better check in to the recovery center. 
Vive La Difference
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4077 posts 4/14/2017 2:10 am |
Quoting tickles4us:
You better check in to the recovery center.
Is there an NoStrings anonymous center tickles4us? Pass the address and meeting times please!!!
Failing that, finding a girlfriend seems like a good cure. Thanx for popping by.
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50231 posts 4/14/2017 6:56 am |
omg..this is the funniest thing i ever read for a long time on this site...you are sooooo friggin genius...marry me...oh wait...i am already married...so i can't do that...but i just lost it when i read "Men Online Hall of Shame"...oh my gawd...i love yah...
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4077 posts 4/14/2017 12:49 pm |
Quoting japaneseass:
omg..this is the funniest thing i ever read for a long time on this site...you are sooooo friggin genius...marry me...oh wait...i am already married...so i can't do that...but i just lost it when i read "Men Online Hall of Shame"...oh my gawd...i love yah...
Aww japaneseass! Many thanx! If sultans can have harems, why not sultanesses? Glad you liked it. Larfs are free in here. For tears, I charge extra! Thanx for popping by.
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