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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
If the Internet was a country its national sport would be complaining
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If the Internet was a country its national sport would be complaining Who would be president of the internet I wonder ? Probably water skiing squirrel . What would its national animal be ? Probably a porn star's asshole . I suppose that shows my bias , most countries have Prime Minsters as their holders of executive authority not presidents . Furthermore I would vote to Optimus Prime to be Prime Minister . Optimus Prime Minister . Did you know that if you have sex with a lady and that lady ejaculates 700 liters of lady ejaculate all over the place and it soaks through the towel you put down and stains your mattress if you try to make a warranty claim because said mattress is only 3 years old and its sagging more than 1.5 inches your claim will be denied because of said stain ? I didn't . Allegedly this is not 100% just the mattress maker (that would be a good last name , Steve Matressmaker) being a dick , its a OSHA thing . Which kind of makes sense . Why should someone have to touch your disgusting bodily-fluid stained mattress ? That's how you get trench foot I believe . And possibly black lung . Speaking of , yesterday my general sickness turned into violent horrible pain in my tongue so I went to the doctor - which is a rare move my part . Turns out I'm not just sick , I'm super sick . I have blisters on my tongue and pus on my tonsils . Sexy ! Last night as I lay on the cool kitchen floor praying for the sweet release of death I thought back to the first lady I "hooked up" with on NoStrings . One time she was sick and she called me up was all "Hey , let's hump" and I was all like "No way , I don't want to get sick" to which she replied "Get over here and sex me right now or I will break the head off your Bossk action figure" . She wouldn't dare I thought to myself , but then she sent me a picture of her holding Bossk in one hand while she pleasured herself with the other . So anyway , I had sex with her and got sick . And because she had to have my sweet body all the time we just kept passing it back and forth for like 6 months . It was dumb . But I will say when you're super sick and gross there's something about dealing out a hard fucking that makes you feel strong and healthy . Momentarily anyway . I assume that's probably a guy thing . Did you know the clit is like huge and goes all over the place ? I didn't . I thought it was just that little nubbin that you gently caress as you slide your business into a fancy lady's rear end . But its not just that . Its like a squid - with the part you see as the head and then there's all these tentacles that wrap around like the whole hole where the dick (or dicks) goes . I guess the two extra long tentacles are the G-spot (if it exists) .  A while back I was listening to a podcast where a gay dude gives people sex advice . It was okay . Mostly my two thoughts were what I think about anything where people give advice . A , the people could ask their question 1000% more succinctly . And B , the answer so said questions is patently obvious 90% of the time . Of course I'm a pedantic jerk so , you know . Bonus of course people often to ask questions they already know the answer to , I guess they just want validation ? Stupid validation . Anyway , there was one thing the gay man said that I thought was very insightful and interesting . A dude was worried because he was into sexual sadism and after his dad died they found out he was violently sexually abusive to his mom . So he was worried about his sexual preferences and what that might mean . The gay guy's response was (in a nutshell) suppose you liked vanilla sex and you found out your dad was a (banned topic) would that make you worry about liking vanilla sex ? Of course not . That kind of blew me away because it makes 100% sense and I never would have thought of it that way . I don't "get" sexual sadism at all (despite my last post) but I recognize that there are people who are into it . As long as you find those people and do your thing its all cool right ? What you like isn't the issue , the issue is if you do it to people with or without their consent .  And finally , where is there so much porn where Captain America is nailing Wonder Woman ? They're not even from the same universe . And she's not American . She's not even human technically . if anything Captain American should be doing the Vindicator to represent the strong alliance between the US and Canada . Or at least the American Dream . But that seems a little on the nose . Plus somehow her being blonde bothers me . The lady Captain America should be a brunette - that seems more America . Of course I suppose the real Captain America should be a Iroquois or some such but hey . 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they might be giants...nice. savage lovecast is something i frequently listen to. you are right on the nose about the questions asked. also, i don't know if it's just me, but do most of the women who call in sound like the same women? toodles.
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Funny, entertaining and I learned something...everything a blog should be. Thanks...I needed that 
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Woohoo, 40 had a lightbulb moment about bdsm! Absolutely true, it's all about consent. I may enjoy being a wicked sadist but that doesn't mean I'd ever dole out the punishment to someone who wasn't interested. Not to be a total pollyanna though, there are certainly bad people frequenting the bdsm community whose concept of consent is shaky at best.   
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I don't get sick often so when I was very sick in the spring, it surprised me how horny I felt. I got Fever! Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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